


Hold Tight

by sackstiel



Series: Hold Tight [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, F/F, Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-18
Updated: 2013-04-13
Packaged: 2017-12-05 18:30:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/726464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sackstiel/pseuds/sackstiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When John Winchester is sent away to rehab for alcohol abuse, Dean and Castiel come out with their relationship. Things are smooth sailing; at least until John is finally through with the program and returns to Lawrence.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Big thanks to Maggie for the beta, you're the best!  
> Please leave me feedback~

He remembers the good days; the days marked by the carefree touches and welcome embraces. Now everything had to be hidden, and traded in secret. What he would do to have those early days back.

 

John Winchester came back from rehab the summer after his oldest son started to date Castiel Novak, his childhood best friend. John was there when the boys first met, on that fateful playground near the preschool in Lawrence. Both kids were covered  in  bruises and scrapes from playing too roughly, Dean protecting Castiel from the bigger kids.The two families grew close after that, Mary and Elizabeth were fast friends; Michael and John tolerated each other for the sake of their wives and children.

When Mary died, John slipped into alcoholism, effectively putting the responsibility of raising Sam, on Dean. The Novaks helped too, of course, as they had come to love those boys as their own.

They all got along, the children; Lucifer, Anna, Dean, Gabriel, Sam and Castiel. They were inseparable. When they were younger, Beth would find them all piled into Lucifer’s bed, all but dead to the world. Beth wasn't around for much longer; she died just 3 years after Mary, leaving the children to Michael and John to take care of.

When Dean went to high school, he started work at Singer Salvage and helped Robert, also known as Bobby, Singer repair junkers and scrap parts. He even got a car out of it; a 1967 Chevrolet Impala. It was his most prized possession from the start.

With the money he saved from working at the garage he sent John to rehab; who had at long- last accepted he had a problem and was willing to change for that sake of his boys.

That was a year ago. Now; Dean was at the airport, standing next to his his father at the luggage carousel to finally return home and bring some semblance to the broken household.

"Thank you, son," John spoke up softly, "I know that I messed up and I-"

"Don't. Everything is fine," Dean assured him quickly. Because it was, and it would be. He knew it. A swipe of a black duffel, a hand to his son’s shoulder, and they were off, finally headed home.

The drive was spent mostly in silence except for the soft noise of the radio in the background. After a few moments of nothing, John cleared his throat and spoke up, eyes never leaving the road.

"How's Castiel? And Gabriel?"

A secret smile.

"Cas is great, Dad. Gabe's still around. He just graduated."

"Good. Good." Pause. "And Sam?"

Dean hesitated. Sam was still angry with his father for his abandonment and for not keeping it together when they had just needed their father.

"Sam is- Sam's Sam. He'll come around," were the only words he could come up with. The rest of the trip, words were lost to them.

On the way through town, there were familiar faces on the streets; Jo picking up groceries, Bobby pumping gas, Adam riding his bike. Dean waved at the couple sitting at the bus stop. Meg and Abaddon, holding hands. Meg smirked and nodded her head, eliciting a scoff from John.

"Queers."

Oh. _Oh._

He didn't know why he was so surprised at this, the way he was raised, the way his father was raised, he should have known. And for the first time he was afraid.

  


They didn't make a big production of John coming home. They invited the Novaks over for pizza; no beer, no win, although they were sure Gabe would find a way to sneak the kiddies some alcohol.

John and Sam had exchanged little words upon his arrival and when John left to wash up, Sam sighed.

"You think he'll be okay?" Sam asked, unsure.

"He's Dad." Pause. "We saw Meg and Ab on the way."

Sam stopped tidying up and turned to face his brother, his brows furrowed. "And?" Dean shrugged and Sam sighed; he already knew, he’s a smart kid. "Go warn them, I'll finish up here."

With a nod, Dean grabbed his jacket and left to jog down the block to the Novak house. He stopped at the front of the lawn, took a deep breath, and walked up to the front door.

"Cas! It's Dean!" Anna cried from her spot near the window, looking up from her reading. She raises an eyebrow before returning her full attention to the magazine in her hands.

The door clicked, and cool air washed over Dean, who did not look up from the ground. Cas pulled him in for a Cas, but paused when Dean hesitated.

When Dean looked up to Castiel’s eyes, he was met with worried brow and a cocked head.

"We- uh. We saw Meg today, me and Dad. She was with Abbadon," Dean forced out, eyes averted. "Cas, I think- we’re gonna need to lay low for a while."

"Dean, he's your father he-" A sharp look. A sigh. "Okay, okay. We'll lay low. But my house is still safe."

With a smile, he tugged Dean inside. Burden lifted for the moment, he allowed himself to be pulled into the house and led up the stairs. He distantly heard the collective greeting from the family as they ran up to Cas's bedroom. A click of the door and switch of a light later, Dean found himself pressed up against the bedroom door, Castiel kissing him forcibly- hard and rough and long. They searched each other and learned each other like the hundred times before. Each hand traced long-remembered patterns down the others skin. Over and over.

Hands wandered, shirts fell, and chuckle was heard from the bed.

A chuckle.

From the vacant bed.

"You know, Castiel, you should really learn how to lock your door," sang Lucifer from the bed, not looking up from his laptop. No. Cas’ laptop.

"Lucifer get out," Cas groaned, picking up their shirts.

"But I was just getting to the good stuff!" he whined, pouting on the bed like a four year old. Dean had a murderous look in his eyes. "Alright, fine, fine. But we've got to go to dinner soon. And by the crease in your brow, I’m guessing there’s bad news from the old drunkard?"

Dean shot him a glare and Castiel huffed as he pulled his shirt back over his head. "Then go, we'll follow."

Dean held the door open for Lucifer who sighed and mumbled something about never getting any action. Serves the bastard right.

Cas took Dean's hand and squeezed encouragingly. They followed Lucifer out the door and back downstairs. Anna coughed to suppress a giggle. Dean glanced over at Cas and smoothed down the mess of his hair with a small grin on his face.

"Everyone ready to go?" Michael came in, carrying two bottle of Pepsi-Cola, slipping his flip flops on. Everyone turned to Dean, Cas squeezed his hand.

Dean sighed and scratched his head. "Listen, I know Cas and I have been pretty out in the open, but my dad he- uh- my dad-"

"Son," Michael interrupted, "I've known John for more than 10 years. He'll warm up to it." Dean cast his eyes aside, unable to find the words to protest. "But, if you need time, then your secrets safe with us." 

There was an unspoken rule in the Novak family: no matter how much they messed around with each other, they always knew where the line was and not to cross it. Especially if it meant endangering anyone, Winchesters included.

 Anna smiled, Lucifer nodded, and Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows.

"Well! Let's go see the old drunk, shall we?" Gabe laughed, which earned him a glare from everyone in the room. Except from Lucifer, who patted Gabe's back and chuckled.

 


	2. Like Glass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Maggie for beta'ing. It's been a while since I've updated but here you are

Throughout everything, Cas and his family were always there for Sam and Dean. When Dean needed a ride home from a party in Wichita because he was too wasted to drive, Gabriel and Lucifer drove the two hours to pick him up and drive the Impala home. When Sammy needed a place to crash for the night because Dean and John were fighting, Michael gave him a key to the house so he wouldn’t have to knock every time he wanted to come over- though both brothers still knock on nearly every occasion.

When John’s alcoholism got worse, the two brothers spent more and more time at the Novak house and no one minded- they were welcome there. Cas set up a space in his room for Dean to keep some extra clothes and Gabe and Luci set up camp for Sam to sleep in their room (much to his initial reluctance).

The hardest thing that Dean had to do was confront his father on his addiction and get him to admit that he had a problem. It wasn’t a pleasant event and ended with John throwing a bottle of whiskey at the kitchen wall and going into a rage. Dean took Sam and they stayed with the Novaks. Dean had been 16.

It wasn’t until a week later when the kids got home from school that they found John arguing with Michael in the garage. When John saw Dean he rushed passed Michael to get to him and bring his boys home.

Michael grabbed John’s arm, swung him around and promptly punched him in the nose. From that moment on, Dean knew that Michael would support and love them all.

With Michael’s help, two weeks later John was in a rehabilitation center in Kansas City and cut off from contact with Sam and Dean.

When Cas and Dean made their relationship known, Michael, Gabe, Anna, and Lucifer were the first to accept them and the first to know. There was not a sliver of a doubt in anyone's mind that the boys were made for each other. From the moment they met, they were joined at the hip. Cas was always there for Dean and Dean was there for Cas; through the bullies and the various girlfriends and boyfriends, through Beth and Mary's deaths and John's addiction- through Lucifer's wrath and Gabe's pranks.

Now that their relationship was public, Dean has gotten more protective and Cas more protective of Dean. When Crowley started hitting on Cas when they first started dating, Dean had a little chat with the pompous jackass. Needless to say, that was the last time he looked Dean or Cas in the eye. That was nothing though, compared to the time that Dean got into a fight with Raphael because Dean almost side-swiped his precious BMW. Castiel handled it with low, resonate words and sharp eyes. And a punch to the nose, but that wasn’t a big deal.

With John back, their need to protect each other increased, not just with Castiel and Dean, but with Michael and Sam and Gabe and Luci and Anna. All were wary of the dinner they were about to have, as well as curious as to how John has progressed and if he has truly changed.

The whole walk to the house, Cas had his jaw clenched, Gabe twirled his lollipop with anticipation and Anna had her fists balled in her hoodie pockets. Michael was the perfectly stoic and Lucifer just the same.

Dean’s fingers were twitching with uneasiness and he itched to reach for Cas’s hand that swung mere inches from his. As if reading his mind, Cas grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze, turning and giving Dean an encouraging nod.

As they continued up the walk to the front porch, a deafening crash was heard from inside the house. Everyone froze, then like lightning, Dean let Cas’ hand drop and bolted the rest of the way to the house, with the others close behind.

Dean flung the door open with a bang and bounded to the kitchen. Sam was on the counter, attempting to get away from the broken glass, a towel wrapped around his cut hand. John was nowhere in sight.

“What the hell?!” Dean exclaimed rushing to his little brother to examine his hand.

“Watch it!” He hissed as Dean roughly grabbed his hand. “I just dropped the salad bowl and I got cut cleaning it up, chill out.”  
Visibly relaxing, Dean wrapped the towel back around his brother’s hand.

Lucifer and the rest of the family were looking in from the living room.

“Come on, Sam, I’ve got my kit back at the house, I’ll take a look at it.” Lucifer walked over to Sam and helped him off of the counter and out into the kitchen.

Dean opened his mouth to protest. “Lucifer I swear-”

“Take the truck.” John walked down the hall and tossed Lucifer the keys to his truck.

Sam looked to Dean for an answer but he just closed his eyes, clenched his jaw, and shook his head. Castiel made his way into the kitchen and gingerly began to pick up the larger shards of glass.

“Don’t start dinner without us,” Lucifer threw over his shoulder with a wink as he headed towards the door. “Come along, Sam,” he added as he shook his head in chastisement.

“Well what the hell are ya’ll doing standing? Sit down,” said John, gesturing to the couch for everyone to sit. “Dean, go help Cas clean up that mess.”

Dean gave the automatic “yes sir” and went into the kitchen. He knelt beside Cas with the dustpan he grabbed from beneath the sink and began picking up and sweeping the smaller pieces.

“He seems better,” Cas murmured, not looking up from the shining pieces.

Dean sighed and shrugged his shoulders. “Yeah, let’s hope he stays like that.”

Cas stopped and rested his hand on Deans. “He will, Dean. For you and Sammy, he will.” Dean looked up to meet his eyes and gave small smile. Dean couldn’t resist the intense sincerity and sheer belief that shown in Cas’ eyes just then. Dean leaned forward just a hair, close enough to feel his breath. Cas leaned forward so their foreheads touched, lips brushing. Dean moved to kiss him chastely, first, then with a growing intensity. The glass was mostly cleaned up anyways.

When they finally separated, Dean stood to empty the shards that collected in the dustpan. He saw a figure standing at the fridge and froze

“My, my, my, and I thought we were shoving you two back into the closet,” Gabriel said just loud enough for Dean to hear. He emerged from the fridge with the ice tray and went to grab some cups.

Castiel swept the remaining glass into a pile and transferred it into the trash before slapping Gabe on the back.

“You boys need to tone it down," Gabe said in, for once, a serious tone. When it came down to it, Gabriel wanted to protect them, though he'd never admit it.

For a moment the pair got lost in each other and forgot everything. Dean wouldn’t let it happen again.  
  


 

Dinner started without a hitch; Sam came back with stitches in his hand and a bitchface to match and Lucifer had the smuggest of grins. Michael said a prayer before they ate and they talked about college plans for Dean and Cas and what they had to finish in the two weeks before graduation.

“I got accepted into Columbia,” Dean added after a break in the conversation. Everyone knew already except John.

“In New York? And how are you gonna pay for that?” was John’s reply. No congrats, no encouragement.

The table fell silent; no sounds of chewing, no murmurs, not even Gabe made a joke.

Dean clenched his fist beneath the table. “I got offered a scholarship for mechanical engineering, a full ride.”

“As long as it’s paid for, son. I’m proud of you,” John smiled at last. Everyone thawed out and resumed eating.

Everyone knew that college was a touchy subject with John. He had hoped that Dean would enlist and follow in his footsteps but that was just not going to happen. College was the root of nearly all of their arguments when John was drunk.

_“How do you expect me to pay for that bullshit? You’ll just spend all your damn time partying!”_

_“You wouldn’t even get accepted anywhere, you can’t even keep steady grades!”_ Which- for the record- was not true. Dean always got straight A’s.

_“Let Sam get the higher education, you don’t stand a chance out there.”_

That last one usually ended it. Dean would storm off to his room or take Sammy and head over to the Novak’s. It didn’t matter because when he came back the next morning, John would be passed out on the couch with a few glasses broken in the kitchen and the floor sticky with whiskey.

Time passed and they drifted from the crowded table to the living room. Sam and Cas animatedly recounted stories of the mishaps in Advanced Placement Chemistry, Anna talked about her freshman year at University of Kansas, Lucifer told gore stories from the emergency room, and John asked about job openings in town and how the general population was doing. Eventually, the conversations drew to a standstill and the Novaks parted.

The entire duration of dinner, Castiel and Dean kept their contact to a minimum, they barely exchanged more than a few words. It was subtleties; a passing glance when Dean picked up plates, the brief brush of fingers as they passed the salad bowl. They restrained themselves and towards the end, the tension from their strain to keep apart was almost visible. Almost.

A few minutes after they left, Dean felt a vibration in his pocket. Followed by another. And another. And yet another.

 _My room, 11?_ \- Cas.

 _U guyz better keep it down tonight_ \- Gabe.

 _I need my beauty sleep_ \- Gabe.

 _I have laxatives, I will use them_ -Lucifer.

Dean replied to Cas first, with a 'Sure thing' and then to Gabe and Luci 'Fuck off' without a second thought.

“Well that went well,” said Sam, sitting on the couch and flicking on the television. Dean nodded his agreement. John joined them after a moment, and they watched Eric Cartman make chili out of the parents of a bully. Yum.

There were no words to exchange, no threats or arguments or urgencies that needed to be addressed; They simply basked in the glorious feeling of being a whole family that they had not felt since Mary was still alive.

  
John bid them goodnight about halfway into the second episode. Sam began to drift off soon after. With a small smile, Dean tossed a blanket over Sam and went upstairs to grab his keys, careful not to stomp on the way back down.

“You going to see Cas?” Sam muttered, half asleep on the lumpy couch.

“Cover for me?” Dean whispered back with a low chuckle.

Sam responded with an incoherent mumble that Dean took as a yes. He slipped out the door and locked it softly behind him.


End file.
